Monday, February 12, 2007

autopsies, paternity tests, political scandal...oh my


This is not your run-of-the-mill celeb demise. Instead it's all playing out like a choice Jerry Springer episode. I read today that not only is Anna Nicole posthumously disgracing Bahaman housing officials but in a truly surreal development, it seems she is busting up Zsa Zsa Gabor's marriage. Say WHA?? Why is this Prince Freddy just now coming forward to say this baby is apt to be his? I believe it to be public knowledge that said baby was born like ,5 MONTHS AGO. I can only guess that Prince Freddy has been very wistfully observing the Anna Nicole media circus and sighed as he thought to himself:"I remember when Zsa Zsa used to be in the news. How I miss her crazy bitch diva days of DUI and cop slapping..life has been so dull since she got tame & senile..." and then inspiration struck "Heeeey...I met Anna Nicole at an Arby's opening back in 1995... I bet I can parlay that into a fictitious decade long secret affair...they'll all believe me...that nutjob banged anything!!"


Ok that was mean... maybe the affair is not entirely fictitious. I'm just reeling from the BIZARR-O-NESS of it all. I was also rather charmed by the "prince" saying "I am going to make the DNA test." or at least, that's how the AP quoted him. How long has this guy been speaking English?? At least 5 years, right? Apparently if you are faux German royalty, nobody dares contradict your f***ed up grammar. But he's a pretty dashing gent , is he not? In kind of a Ricardo Montalban way?? Hmm?


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