It's Monday again...

... and I'm back to pondering oddball shit. This cubicle does strange shit to my brain. So the fixation du jour: Richard Dawson. Well, it's not like it's totally out of the blue. Here follows the chain of banter that led me to Sir Dawson...


Robin was telling me about this high school crush of hers that she described as a "bad boy". And I said a bad boy in Claremont was apt to be seriously bad..he must have wound up in the hoosgow at some point. This remark launched me on a tangent about the word "hoosgow" which is my preferred euphemism for jail just because it strikes me as so off the wall. I actually learned the word from an episode of Family Feud where one of the questions was "Name a slang term for prison" and hoosgow--if you can believe it-- was THE #1 ANSWER! This totally floored me (particularly since I'd never heard of "hoosgow" at that point). How did "hoosgow" beat out "slammer"?? I always wondered how & where they conducted their "Survey Sez..." surveys. Whenever they made mention of The SURVEY on FF, I had this silly notion in my head of Mark Goodson Productions staffers (well, probably interns ) going door -to-door with clipboards (like doing the census) "Hello ma'am...are you familiar with the television program FAMILY FEUD?? Well, if I could have a moment of your time..." That's right boy...open with "Family Feud" ...they will be powerless to deny you once they know that Family Feud is involved. Anyways, I'm wondering if the "Name a slang term for prison" survey was conducted entirely in a state that has wonky oddball dialect in general... like maybe Minnesota or thereabouts. Anyways, had I been a contestant on that FF episode I would've objected. "Ah, Richard, no sir. I don't buy it. I would like to SEE the survey, if I can please.." So anyways I was exclaiming to Robin the utter ridiculousness of "hoosgow" being the #1 slang term for prison, and I added "well, I get very worked up watching Family Feud anyways" But then I further stipulated: "well, just when I watch the Richard Dawson-hosted episodes."

And thusly I came to be contemplating the fascinating Mr Richard Dawson. Presently, I feel the most astounding thing about him is that he truly is RETIRED. It seems to me to be a rare thing for someone in show biz to really retire, stick to it, and be content with it. I say --Good for you, Dawson!! To hell with fame--just golf, and travel and spend your money! Cheers! On the other hand, I wouldn't mind seeing him on the telly again.
Anyways, as is my custom when my mind is in thrall to some arbitrary subject, I hastened to wikipedia to do some half-ass research. Here are 3 things I learned...
1. He was the motivation for the-powers-that-be @ The Match Game to change the bonus round to include a "celeb panelist wheel" the contestant had to spin to determine which celeb they would team up with to play the bonus round. Previously, the contestant simply picked which celeb they wanted to work with. Well, after Dawson had been a Match Game regular for a while, contestants were SO apt to choose him as a bonus round partner (wiki more specifically claims "most contestants would choose him 3 to 1 over the other five panelists ") that they instituted said wheel. After I read this, I reminisced over my own limited viewership of Match Game (I was on quite a Match Game kick for a while actually) and it made perfect sense. Dawson was always my favorite panelist--for many reasons, with one of them being that he was the only one on the show who consistently had his wits about him.

2. Richard is currently married to some Gretchen lady *whom he met when she was a Family Feud contestant in the early '80s* This amuses me immensely. It made me think "So his trademark smoochiness was not just for show, eh?" Remember that? He was all over the contestants. That's why the guy--in my book-- is THE host of Family Feud. He hosted the hell outta that show AND made being a total lech look cool. Al Borlin could not pull that off, dude.
3. There is actually a fan site called The Richard Dawson Experience. I have provided here a link but feel free to skip it. It's one of those "angelfire" pages and every bit as crappy as those sites tend to be. Without ever beholding the site, the mere fact that there is an existant "Richard Dawson Experience" webpage strikes me as damn funny. I had a quick peek around the site (no in-depth spelunking) but I read the bio of this site proprietor that just makes me feel tremendously cool by comparison. (shit, that's quite catty. I may be cool/coolish now, but I am bound for hell for sure. Specifically that ring reserved for petty, mean, girls) Site master is, surprisingly not 56, she is 26 and it sounds, from my cursory psycho-analysis of her self-penned bio, like she's got her share of social handicaps to contend with.