lunchtime yammer. . . .

Right now am listening to Accuradio's Classic Rocktopia station (the "'78 and on" subchannel) and they are playing --to my immense elation-- "I'm on Fire". My FAVE Springsteen song.. I'm astounded and indignant that this is left off his big Greatest Hits album. I know I've mentioned that once before in a post, but it bears repeating...I'm pretty rabid about that song. Which is funny, since in general, I'm not much of a Springsteen fan. "Dancin' in the Dark" is great, and I adore "I'm on Fire", but I'm pretty indifferent to the rest of his catalog. Although he seems like a cool guy...intelligent, and down-to-earth and all that good stuff...

I am somewhat perturbed at my missing "House" last night. I read the episode recap on the FOX website and it sounded like it was mucho entertaining.

Today, I am guilty of perpetrating one of the most wicked, atrocious, and widely disdained fashion crimes --pre Memorial Day white pants. OK, welllll, that is mock remorse, folks. I do this ALL THE TIME. And I wear them after Labor Day. Just this specific pair of pants. I adore them. They are Daisy Fuentes brand pants I got at Kohls. Y'know I can't really think of even one special thing Ms Fuentes has contributed to the world of pop culture, but I LOOOOVE what she's done for bourgeois fashion. I have 2 pair Daisy Fuentes pants (1 white & 1 black) and they are utterly delightful. So I will wear them after Labor Day. And I will wear them before Memorial Day. And I will wear them in a boat. And I WILL wear them with a goat. And with a fox, and in a box, and in a house and with a mouse, and on a barge, and with Large Marge** , and with an ocelot and near the coffeepot and WHATEVER THE HELL TIME OF YEAR I WANNA because they are so good, so good you see?

Sorry for getting carried away there, although I am quite proud to have come up with a slant rhyme for "ocelot".

New product junkie that I am, I have recently tried Diet Coke Plus. The whole premise kind of struck me as asinine. I think, if you're looking to DIET COKE for your daily dosages of vitamins and minerals (and WHY , pray tell, does "vitamins" always get top billing? Do you ever hear of a product being touted as having "minerals & vitamins"?? Yeah, me neither. You'd think there would be bruised egos & squabbles, culminating in "minerals" ditching the partnership in favor of the Rat Pack...a la Dean Martin) then you're approaching health & nutrition in a rather half-assed manner. Now half-assed, well-meaning gestures are really my forte, so asininely switching from Diet Coke to Diet Coke Plus would seem to be a apropos move for yours truly...except...I have discovered that Diet Coke & DC+ are NOT interchangeable, taste-wise. DC+ tastes just like Diet Coke w/ Splenda, which I HATE. Maybe it has Splenda in there,I dunno. Oh, and I apologize for that excessively longwinded parenthetical note earlier in this paragraph. Pardonnez-moi. . .

I've been poring over my EW Summer Movie Preview issue and though there are quite a few flicks that look good, there's only one movie that I am urgently determined to catch in the theatre...and that is Stardust. Totally seems like my kinda movie. Plus, I like Claire Danes. Plus-- unicorns!! It has at least one unicorn in it. That's raaaaad.

I think I want to read the novel by Neil Gaiman before I see the movie (which is not slated to hit theatres until early August, so that gives me plenty of time to polish off "Our Mutual Friend" and maybe another and then read "Stardust") Looks like I have something to buy with my Holiday Rewards $$ at Borders. Yaay..

Thinking of this movie, got me thinking about last year's The Fountain , (another oddball sci-fi/fantasy type flick) which I'd wanted to see but missed. I believe it was hustled in and out of theatres rather rapidly, but since it didn't play anywheres within a 200 mile radius of me, I can't say for sure. But that's in the past, eh? "The Fountain" comes out on DVD next Tues so if anyone wanted to buy me a belated Mother's Day gift there you go. I know I'm not your mother, I'm not anybody's mamma, but you may have felt that I have, occasionally or consistently, directed a maternalish kindness towards you in the past. Or if you find me to be a cold, unnurturing bitch, but amazingly want to buy me a Happy Mid-May Gift anyways....there ya go. Whatev. Just buy it for me, 'kay?? I'm trying to be good with my $$ but one cannot just shut her covetousness off like a faucet, y'know? It's TOUGH!!

Accuradio just played Van Halen's "Beautiful Girls" which, I must confess, up until 2min ago, I'd thought was called "On Top of the World". So I had the title wrong. Fricassee my ass. I'm not perfect!! In my heart, whatever the dang title, this will always just be the Schmitt's Gay song. And if you don't remember that SNL beer commercial parody (Sandler & Farley housesitting, out at the pool & ogling a troupe of speedo clad "hunks") then, unfortunately I can NOT help you out, because I couldn't find it anywhere on the whole wide 'net. Crazy, right? I can find the elusive Gladiator Malibu in all his airhead glory, but I cannot find Schmitt's Gay. And that one is CLASSIC!! You're going to have to trust me that it was hi-fucking-larious , as this was the best I could find...

Oh, did anybody else watch that SNL in the 90s special that NBC ran this weekend? I did. I suspect it's probably hip to regard SNL as having "jumped the shark" around 1984, but I don't agree with that. SNL in the 90s --particularly the early 90s with Sandler, Spade, Farley &co.--was terrific. Sez me. I loved seeing that smutty "Canteen Boy" skit with Alec Baldwin again. That one kills me every time.

**"Tell 'em ...Large Marge sent ya" BWAAAAARRRGH!!!