My coworker Julie came upon me in the kitchen as I was desperately shaking our P.O.S. vending machine and growling “Don’t you f****ing do this to me. I need some chocolate!!” Yep, you guessed it—the Raisinets I’d just shilled out 85 cents for were caught in the dispensing springy-thingie. I really am trying to make wise food decisions, but my Lean Cuisine lunch was both miniscule and heinous and my palate required some sort of compensation. So I compromised , ‘kay? Raisinets have raisins in ‘em (it’s aFACT. File that under “ya learn somethin’ new everydamnday”) And—bonus points—these were dark chocolate raisinets. Which means I was countering the naughty excess fat & cal with BEAUCOUP ANTIOXIDANTS, baby!!
Anyways, I was shaking the hell out of said machine, resisting the urge to grab it by the top rear corners and shake it while stepping one foot into the swingy door of it because I realize that that’s how people wind up crushed under vending machines and yet I also suspect that if you escape a crushing, it is the most effective way to retrieve one’s stuck Raisinets. * Julie came in and bought Raisinets, solely for the purpose of dislodging mine, and she didn’t even want Raisinets (she afterwards bought some chips for herself) and then gave me the 2nd bag of Raisinets. Consequently, I was just beside myself with gratitude, really nauseatingly profuse about it, and in my stammerings said “Oh gosh, THANK YOU. You just made my weekend!!”
So. I ask yous-- how pathetic is my upcoming weekend that a free bag of Raisinets *made* my weekend?? And really – I got babysitting and cleaning my car on the itinerary—I was not exaggerating much.
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