Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Grody notes (skip if you's squeamish!)

I wasn't going to go to the folks' casa tonight, but my Dad called me at work (at just about quittin' time) and asked me to come. He's been sick all day...my mum had told me he had the shits but I hadn't realized he'd been vomitting too. Well, he's been having stomach flu symptoms all day and my mother was around for most of it, but she's really in no condition to be of any help to him. So he sent her off with Laura and thought he'd just sleep it off alone. Well around 4:15 or so, he got up to go get fresh air outside, but as soon as he got up a simultaneous wave of dizziness& nausea hit him. He didn't pass out (nearly did) but he plunked back down in his recliner and got sick all over the livingroom rug**.

Well, he didn't cover the ENTIRE rug, of course. It seems he got a sizeable patch right in front of the recliner pretty well yarf-covered. He cleaned most of it up..but there was some (UGH) debris for me to pick up before I sprayed the Resolve foam (and laid down 9 or 10 layers). A lot of said debris looked like that pickled ginger that comes complimentary with supermarket sushi. I never eat the ginger...and uhh, after today I probably NEVER will.

Since I've got my grody momentum going, I will further divulge (flouting all laws of good taste) that I had shreds of tomato skin floating around the bowl amidst my runny #2 this evening. Apparently languishing undigested all afternoon because I had tomatoes w/ my lunch, not my dinner. I made myself a really good dinner actually...which I can't even detail in this icky post. It wouldn't be right. Instead I'll close with a gross confession (which is barely relevant, aside from it being gross)..here goes...not a deep DARK confession, but it will surely shatter my image as a paragon of demureness (as so many of y'all perceive me, I know)...ok without further ado..next thing I type will be the aforepromised confession...well perhaps some more elipses...right, no more stalling:
I've long thought the shower is just the ideal venue for flatulence.. the perfect accoustics make it oddly gratifying.

**He called me immediately apres puke to appeal to me to come nurse him. Good timing--he sounded AWFUL. There was no saying no

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