Thursday, March 08, 2007

TV talk...

I'm so vexed by this past Top Design that I will at last be able to write about Heroes. This new upset has allowed me to redirect my rage from NBC and aim it toward Bravo. Let us ignore the fact that they're both one in the same corporation, shall we??

Let me gripe chronologically, and begin with Heroes.

My big gripe is that they're taking a month long break when I don't want them to even take a smallish break. That's not okay with me (not that anyone checked with me first). It might be excusable if they were planning to do an entire summer of new episodes, but that would never happen.
But anyways, about this past episode.... I suppose Malcolm McDowell made an alright Linderman. It's really not his fault that I was disappointed. It's just that when I was pondering who they could possibly cast as Linderman, and more specifically, who they could find who could possibly be as awesomely badass as Eric Roberts...Malcolm McDowell did not make that very short list. I tossed off Christopher Walken --half-jokingly-- as a contender. I knew there was no way, but how fucking AWESOME would that have been? I don't know that he'd ever do TV work, but I think that's more due to his schedule preferences than him being at all choosy. This is the man, after all, who will next be seen in theatres in a comedy called Balls of Fury. Oh, but let's not forget his turn as the nefarious nemesis of THE COUNTRY BEARS in their feature film debut. Oh, but I do wish the Heroes people had made a pitch to him. They could've given Linderman super powers...super tap dancing powers. That mighta snared Walken. Dude loves to dance.

Or imagine this equally awesome, equally implausible scenario: GARY BUSEY. Mix Roberts' supercool badass flava with Busey's bat guano loco brand of bad ass and ...KAPOW! What a cocktail that coulda been, eh? Not that I believe Busey could ever pull his shit together to do a weekly series...

Michael Madsen is a fantastic badass. He hasn't been in anything exceptional lately has he???

But WHATEV. They've done cast the durn role and Malcolm MacDowell, while not meeting my unrealistically lofty expectations, is still a good actor.

After Mr. "H.R.G." Bennett totally endeared himself to me in the "Company Man" episode, I am really worried about his fate now. Eric Roberts is on to him!! EEEk! Not to be all EricRobertscentric, but does Eric Roberts' character have a name?? It mentally takes me out of the narrative to have to refer to him as Eric Roberts. I suppose if no actual name is given for him, there's probably some code name (like HRG) issued for him. HRG Boss? I guess HRGB would be even more concise wouldn't it? But back to the plot (it seems I can't STOP myself from dwelling on Eri--um, I mean from dwelling on HRGB) I worry for poor HRG, even if rationally I doubt the company would actually kill him off.

As for others whose fate looks scarily precarious...
I am not all that put out by the apparent imminent demise of Mohinder. I was momentarily impressed with him--his surprising bit of slyness --how he didn't let on he'd figured out who Sylar was and then drugged his tea. I was all "Wooohoo! I guess this dude is not as dim as he seems" But shortly thereafter I changed my mind on that point. Maybe Mohinder was also thinking "Woohooo! Looks like I'm not as dim as I'd thought.." thereby rendering him vulnerable via his cockiness. Of course I don't like to see anybody telekinetically impaled to a ceiling, but Mohinder is a pretty ho-hum character, so if it had to happen to somebody...
Conversely I do NOT want to see sweet Pete roughed up by Sylar. Now even though I remember that he retained a bit of Claire's powers (as evidenced by his speedy recovery from plummeting umpteen stories onto a taxi) my visceral reaction to somebody getting their skull sliced into is that it is a highly disagreeable experience. My poor,poor Peter Petrelli...

And now for my Top Design rant…GRRRRR! I am just pissed about Ryan’s elimination. As you may have guessed, I like the artsy rebel. I did expect him to get the boot, but it shouldn’t have happened on this challenge. It was NO FAIR, I tells ya!!

A quick aside before I address that injustice…
I just want to say—Kelly Werstler is kind of endearing herself to me. Initially I had dismissed her as merely bringing “the pretty” to the judge’s panel (y’know as the Klum stand-in) but she distinguished herself in Ep 4. Mags & Adler are sooo indignant, and huffy and (most of all) wounded by Ryan’s uncensored (&tactless) opinions he tosses off that neither of them even bothered to try to get what he’s trying to say. But Werstler gets him. She likes him too, I think. When she spoke up & defended him in Ep 4, that’s when it first occurred to me that she might be half- worthwhile. And of course, in this last episode, that bitch Margaret Russell had to throw that back in her face. And while Kel did not verbally retaliate, she shot back this glance that just screamed “Kiss my skinny ass, you miserable hag!” The unspoken animosity was palpable. It was great.

But back to Ryan's wrongful elimination... I do agree that this kooky kid's ampitheater garage would've benefitted from some waaay out wall graphics. HOWEVER, that was not Ryan's only job!! HE WAS SUPERVISING ALL THE CARPENTRY!! He was working his artsyfartsy arse off, actually but NOBODY saw fit to mention that fact!!

I would've like to have seen Carissa eliminated, but she was the red herring again. OR, I definitely would've been fine with Michael getting booted too. I mean, putrid color choice was the entire basis for Elizabeth's dismissal, so it's certainly enough reason to axe Michael. But really, it should've been Carissa. I seriously don't get why the show is so resistant to booting her...probably it's on account of her being a real in-yer-face bitch and that always makes for good TV. This show's particular format--doing just one room and having one final product vs. the usual format of multiple rooms vying for the win--was kind of dullsville. Obviously, one of the main goals of doing it that way was to test the designer's teamwork skills. Now if your team pretty much unanimously brands you as a unhelpful & self-involved that's a fair indication that you're not a good team player....CARISSA. I swear, if that rotten shrew wins this competition, I want Bravo to GUARANTEE me a 2nd season (so that they can redeem themselves) It still feels early to say, but I think that Goil has a good shot. But Matt & Erick are my two faves (Matt a smidge more so) .

Speaking of Matt, I felt like he sort of got the shaft this episode too. Not only did he have to team with lousy Carissa, but he got the hugely foul task of having to sort through this family's accumulated CRAP and organize it all. (and by the way, how lucky is this Bell family to get some TV show to do that for them?? Who are these people that they snagged that sweet deal?? Might they be chummy with some network execs??) And Matt organized the HELL out of that garage!! But that bastard guest judge would not give poor Matt ONE SHRED of credit! Noooo...instead he was criticized for not "composing"! WTF?? This is a buttload of JUNK (& assorted paraphenalia) not the bloody London Philharmonic Orchestra!! I am very glad this judge was appearing in one episode only. Lousy bum.

I feel like I'm slighting poor Goil by not including him amongst my faves, because he's a decent chap and is certainly not without talent. But I just can't shake the irksome feeling that he's the "golden boy" the teacher's pet of this show. Very much in the tradition of Daniel Vosovic and Kara Saun before him. See, I simply cannot stop myself from looking at this show in a Project Runway context!! What is UP with that?? Anyways, I am quite intrigued by previews for next week's eppy, namely the bit where Goil has a hissy fit. "I thought you'd be so cool to work with" he snivels "but it's been A NIGHTMARE!" (or something to that effect...I can't get the Bravo site's clip to play so's I could quote verbatim) But of course, you can't see whom he's talking to. I wanna know!! I'd hate to think he's coming down on Matty. If there was a Goil-Matt tiff, I think y'all know whose side I would take up, but I really don't think either fellow is made to withstand a brawl very well. Actually, now that Ryan's out, the only fight-ready contender in this bunch is Carissa. (But who would dare challenge her?? Well, besides yours truly...)

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