My car wouldn't start this morning. It would turn over but it wouldn't "catch". I guess the lucky part about it is that I'd stayed over at my folks' (laundry day went into OT) and I was able to borrow their car and get to work (relatively) on time. But that's just me "glad-gaming" the situation, trying to take the high road, and all the while eyeballing this inviting miasmic swamp of self-pity that I would like to sink into and wallow about in for a spell. No..no! Self-pitying & griping-BAD. Polly-anna--GOOD.
But DAAAAMN IT! Allow me just the briefest of detours from the high road, wouldja? I just hafta say how I WISH I was obscenely rich. I wish I had that disgusting sort of lifestyle where if one of my fleet of cars didn't start in the morning, well I would just take my Jag instead of the Mercedes, and one of the staff might call out "And what about the Mercedes , ma'am? Shall I ring for a tow truck?" and I would say "FUCK THAT! Dump a load of mulch in there, we're turning it into a planter!" Nawww, just kidding. I would not be THAT ridiculous if I were rich. But maybe I'd say " Oh THAT. I'd nearly forgot. Well whatev. If you want to deal with the hassle of getting it fixed, Jeeves, you can HAVE the damn car! Ciao!"
But such is not my lot in life and I AM fairly vexed about my vehicular woes, but trying to be a good sport/not stress about it. I do like everything happening at the apropos time (ie: breakfast food only in the a.m., Christmas carols only between 11/15--1/6, etc) and I suppose a Monday morning is the absolute perfect time for my car to crap out on me. And crap out on me all suddenly & inexplicably like too. Terrif. My dad asked me if I'd had trouble with it and I said it had been running absolutely fine, but then he gave me a bit of a doubting expression, as if to infer that maybe I'd been an inattentive owner, hadn't been "listening" to my car and missed some vital clues. It HAS been running fine damn it!!
Oy vey. I should've had some beers at lunch, methinks.
No comments:
Post a Comment