Reindeer Games

Hello dare, bahmemba me?
I took a week and a day off from work and--though I'd not intended it-- a week and a day off from blogging. It's not as if I haven't been on the computer. I made sure to upload photos I took of my snowman. I looked up recipes online. I made CDs. It's just seemed as though I left my will to blog here in my cubicle...along with my white sweatshirt.
I didn't do anything overly fabulous with my vacation time... it was mostly used up with Christmas preparations (and I'm still not quite prepared) I will commence with an overview--brief as I can manage-- following a brief photo-tribute to my snowman, who was buried alive this past Thursday.


I call this one, "Happy Waving Snow-fellow--Mid-day":



And now we have here less of a close-up with "Happy Waving Snow-fellow--Late Afternoon /Early Twilight"

And the last piece in our series, which I have dubbed "Happy Waving Snow-fellow: Nighttime"


See how undaunted he is by encroaching darkness? That little snow-fellow was all heart. Hell of a lotta chutzpah, ya know. He will be missed.

Oh snap. ..I never thought to name the li'l guy. I retrospectively christen him..Allistair.

Okay a rundown of my vaca, bullet-pointed, to encourage brevity:

• *Made a snowman on 12/10. I had been wanting to build a snowperson for a while but just hadn't gotten around to it. By "a while" I mean about the past 3 winters. It's not that I've just sat gazing out the window, sighing at the winterscapes before me, just idlly thinkin' "Gawsh a snowman would be swell, eh??" NOT THE CASE, MON FRERE!! I've actually gone out--booted & be-mittened-- to commence with the snow-dude construction but I always have the bad luck /timing to get the snowman jones when the wrong sort of snow is falling. Meaning-- I go out and make a snowball, then bat it around on the ground (like a kitten with some yarn) but the ground snow will NOT adhere to the snowball snow...thereby totally impeding snowperson construction --by all traditional methods. But this last time I was NOT deterred by unadhesive snow and I dredged the deepest depths of my McGyverism reserves and triumphed!! So I constructed Allistair (posthumously named ) by packing snow into different sized buckets. Consequently he is very cylindrically shaped and I didn't dare fuss too much reshaping his bodily components, since the snow was barely sticky at all. I thought the oversized Santa hat did nicely for obscuring the cylindricality of his noggin, anyway.
• *Shopping, shopping, shopping. I still have a smidge more to do... for my Aunt Laurel...need somethin' for my bro-in-law...want to get a little something else for my Mom, my Chloe & my Sadie. Yesterday I went to Scotland By The Yard shopping. I'm rather fond of that store...not that I frequent the place or anything. It's sort of out of the way and it was only the 2nd time I'd been there. But still, it fills me with a sort of nationalist pride and makes me happy to be 1/4 Scottish and 1/4 Irish. This seems a good time to again mention my clan tartans..refer to this post of a coupla months ago. So I DID make a purchase and it is plaid item....but not our plaid..I'm sorry, our TARTAN. If it was for me, I would have insisted it be of the clan Matheson, I felt almost traitorous just buying the thing. But it was to be a gift, of course, and the future recipient , I am quite certain, is more concerned with color palette than she is with historical legitimacy or whatever. OK, OK, it's a wool blanket for my sister... I was trying to subtly & discreetly obscure the details but why the hell am I bothering? My sister has never, WILL never access my blog (luckily for me) Anyways I felt sheepish already, poaching another clan's tartan. And this tartan was labelled "MacDonald of the clan Ranald". No kidding... Ronald McDonald tartan. That made me chuckle. Anyways I was remarking about this to my mother while I was being rung up and this dude overheard me and he cuts in..all zealous-like.."Are you MacDonald of the Ranalds? Because I'm a MacGooglyMoogly and they were related to that clan!!" (OK, so I don't truly remember the dude's last name...it was Mac-somethingerother) And I'm all "No..I'm a Matheson. I just like the colors of this blanket" and the guy was SOO clearly disappointed in me...and... I could be imagining it but I think he was trying to suppress his disgust. That did not help my feelings of shameful clan-treason guilt. Well, they were real bad for a half minute or so. But then I decided to tape the Scotland-by-the-Yard receipt to the bottom of the gift box thereby enabling Laura to return the blanket if she wants. And of course that means if she doesn't. . . clan treason is on HER head. Oh..I am really botching this attempt at brevity....damn.
• *Sappy sappy lameass Christmas movies-- I have watched Fa-la-la-la Lifetime's " The Road to Christmas" (not too shabby) and, last night, "Lost Holiday: the Jim & Suzanne Shemwell Story" (LAAAME, though I maintain my total & eternal adoration of that yummy Dylan Walsh) I am wanting to catch ABC Fam's offerings: "Christmas Caper" and to a lesser extent:"Holiday In Handcuffs" Speaking of required holiday viewing, I had to watch "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" last night while decorating my parents Christmas tree . I don't mind the movie, but the experience of watching it with my Dad present is somewhat excruciating. Forget the fact that his laughter is--objectively speaking-- wildly excessive.... the WORST is that he gives a play by play of the movie. "Oh the sled part is coming up next!! He sprays his coaster with cooking spray and goes like HELL! He (uncontrollable guffaws) winds up (more guffaws) IN THE WALMART PARKING LOT" Did I say somewhat excruciating? Well, I was being nice. Incidentally , my fave holiday movie classic is "A Christmas Story" with Ralphie, Red Ryder &co. I'm entertaining the notion of buying it on DVD. I just LOVE that one. How can I be sustained with just a worn out ol' VHS copy, I ask ya?

Well I gotta jet....I didn't really canvas the entire 10 days off (6 off from work / 10 off from posting) but I really don't think I left out anything noteworthy either. If I think of anything, I shall be sure to apprise of those omission in a future post, mmm-kay??

CIAO!!

my grown up lady purse

I am very fickle about purses. At times, I don't even want the hassle of lugging a purse around. At these times, I very mannishly jam my wallet into my arse pocket and go on my merry way. But most of the time, I have too many necessary accoutrements (hair clippie, mints, compact,etc..) to be able to forego a purse. And I tire of purses quickly. I want to change them out all the time. So I'd been using this black canvas tote (emblazoned w/ AC/DC logo) since the start of August. Quite a while, si? Well, because it was big with no organizational pocket system (making it absolutely impossible to find anything within in less than a minute) and because I got a mustard stain on it on Labor Day and because I was just plain getting sick of it.... I bought a new purse on Monday night.

I have been calling it "my grown-up lady purse" and I am quite enamored** with it. I was trying to find a pic of it on the Kmart website (YES, I bought the thing @ Big K...don't you sneer at me) but it's not on there. Maybe I have a West Lebanon store exclusive, who the hell knows... Anyways, it is a doctor's satchel style bag...the top is dark brown leatherstuff with muted gold accents..the pouchy part of the bag is off-white and cable knit. I have just become increasingly smitten with the thing... it's rather sophisticated and has this real autumnal** feel to it. I have been embracing fall fashion as of late...today I'm sporting jeans, my fave brown boots, maroon v-neck long sleeve shirt under an olive corduroy blazer, with a plaid wool scarf. The whole ensemble strikes me as pretty autumnal anyways. And of course I am carrying my grown up lady purse. This indirectly led to me TOTALLY insulting my boss this morning.

Allow me to elaborate...

I was blathering this a.m. about how much I adore my grown-up lady purse, and Robin joked " Is that the one you tuck under your arm and it makes you look like Sophia Petrillo??" and I laughed and said "PICTURE IT... Sicily 1932..." in a very funny voice that didn't sound anything like Estelle Getty. And there was much chortling. And then (as I was mixing up my a.m. coffee) I thought to say "Did you know that Betty White was married for many years to the dude who hosted 'Super Password'??" Dialogue proceeded like so ...

ROBIN: Yes! I did know that! Alan somebody...

ME: Alan Ludden

ROBIN: YES!

HEATHER: Who?

ROBIN: Betty White. Married to Alan Ludden. Who hosted 'Super Password'

HEATHER: I've never heard of 'Super Password' I don't know who Betty White is either..

ME: Yes you do!!! If I'd said Rose from the Golden Girls you woulda known right off

HEATHER: OOoooh...

ROBIN: And now she does those Pet Meds commercials. She's like 100 years old

ME: Heey! She does alright for her age! She's very spry...for an old broad. I should like to be an old broad like that when I am an old broad!!

MAGGIE/BOSSLADY (with her shoddy hearing, just picking up that last scrap of conversation): WHO are you talking about??

ME: YOU!!

Yeeeeah, sometimes my quick wit is too quick for my liking. Everybody was laughing--Mags included--- but I felt perhaps I crossed the line and my face got about as maroon as my shirt and then I made another pot of coffee. Mostly because I'd used up the last of the coffee but also kind of as a means to make amends.

Even more beloved than my grown-up lady purse is this scarf o' mine. I picked it up at this Celtic shop in Ottawa last summer...it is the Matheson (that's my mum' maiden name) family tartan. Or I should specify-- it is the formal clan tartan. My sister bought a scarf at that same shop, one in our clan's hunting tartan.. Visual aides to follow, I'm sure you will agree with me that MY tartan is far more attractive...

Well agree with me or no, this scarf IS the shiz-nit, and Sept-March I am liable to don it anytime I wear an outfit that is even remotely matchy. Today though, my passion for fall fashion proved a skoach ill-advised as it's in the high 70s out there. I could take off the jacket but, really, this shirt does NOT look so hot on its own (it rather highlights my back bacon if ya know what I mean).

** autumnal & enamored are on this weird list of impressive vocab words that we are compiling in our crazy-ass office. It's a new thing... so far it's just : autumnal, enamored, & mercurial

CHECK yo'self b4 ya wreck yo'self...

A'right, I don't want y'all to think that I am ENTIRELY frivolous... so I should mention that last night I also went to Walmart & bought new wiper blades. My father urged me to go to AutoZone because they'll install 'em for free. Oh, pish, whatev. I can replace wiper blades on my own. Going to Walmart wasn't totally an act of defiance...it happens to be in the same plaza as Borders and I didn't fancy going across town to AutoZone. I'm all about "one-stop shopping" y'know.

Honestly though, I did have a spot o' difficulty replacing those wiper blades. It's not a terribly complicated procedure or anything like that but the trouble was the old blades' condition (frozen & rusted) and my fingers' condition (just frozen). But eventually I managed it. GIRL POWER!! WOOOO!

In other practical purchasing news, I am in the market for new checks. I just
finished off my 2nd box of these checks...their theme was sort of the fads & events of the 20th century. There were 7 designs: years 1900-1920 /yrs 1920-1930/1930-40/1940-50/1950-60/1960-70/1970-80/1980-90/and 1990-99 and like the 30s one had a pic of FDR on it and there was, I think, a TV dinner on the 50s check and that sorta thing. It was a cool theme for about a 1/2 box worth of checks but I eventually I got bored as hell with 'em. I was very relieved when I wrote out the very LAST 20th ce. check the other day.

So, because I wanted checks that visually stimulate me (and don't become tiresome too quickly) and also because a check is somewhat like a modern day calling card (shouldn't say "modern day" as checks are pretty passé these days) I took a good hunk of time today deliberating over what design to get. I still have not decided. I actually pasted screen caps of all my most favoritest styles to an email which I sent out to my coworkers -seeking their input. I have no intention to go by what they tell me, but I find that sometimes an outside ruling helps you to really weed out what you don't want...

So, some standout check designs...

"Fresco" design from the Check Gallery. This design is very pretty. I do like 'em. But I feel like these checks tell people: "I AM BORING". Which is pretty much true, but I don't wish to broadcast that.

Argyle checks from Styles Check co. I love argyle. It's high up there on my "fave patterns" mental list ...probably it's 4th on there, right after the Matheson tartan (a sentimental favorite), houndstooth check & herringbone. But I feel like, after going through 2 boxes of these, I will utterly HATE argyle. Plus, these are a bit on the boring side too.

KISS checks --also from Styles. Ideal for covering business expenses when you're dispatching with commissions handed down to you by your superior officer in the KISS army. Ha! Be sure to sheath these in a matching KISS logo leather checkbook cover.
Styles has a small category of "super fan" designs where you can get checks with your favorite rock star on 'em , WWE personality,or country singer (there was a shitload of country music checks available..blecch! But it follows that there would be some NASCAR checks offered too. This, shockingly, was NOT the case. What gives, dudes??) I can understand the inclusion of KISS in the "rock star" subsection (they ARE legends), but the other offerings were just silly. Who the f is ordering PANTERA CHECKS, I'd like to know?? Oh, and in a similar vein (that being bewilderingly obscure check designs) Styles also sells Elvira checks. You heard correct: ELVIRA CHECKS. Who the hell orders those?? I mean besides those Oakridge Boys-- who are infamously fond of her ("hearts on fire" reportedly...)
Anyways, I like KISS and these checks definitely don't fall into the dread "boring" category. But I don't like KISS that much. Perhaps I'd consider it if all 4 designs had shots of the fabled Simmons TONGUE...

"Fernando" checks...again from Styles. I must concede, those guys are awesome over at Styles. Normally, I would skip the "Animal" category altogether, but I thought-- wtf, I'll just take a quick peek. I was surprised to find these bizarro checks in that group. These crack me up. But I think they would only crack me up for a very limited time.

Styles also sells Las Vegas checks. These are totally foxy checks. But I feel like I have no business having Vegas checks as I don't live in or even remotely near Vegas, have never visited there, have no immediate plans to visit...
Still, they are quite attractive.. . .

I like these Flower Fairies checks from Classic Checks. I have admired Cicely Mary Barker's illustrations before. I don't think I can do any fairy themed checks though. It's the whole checks-as-representation concept...a fairy theme would imply to people that I harness the healing powers of crystals and have some gross new agey lower back tattoo... y'know, that whole type. I can't allow that...

These Beatrix Potter checks are a real front runner. Aren't they a-freakin'-DORABLE?? I don't know if it's a positive representation of yours truly but everything it implies is true-- I am hopelessly regressed ..also a Brit wannabe.

From Image Checks you can buy My Little Pony checks. I guess that's all I wanted to point out-- that you can buy My Little Pony checks. And I love that fact. But this is like the KISS checks. I'm not that into My Little Ponys. Although I would DEFINITELY buy these if I were opening a checking account for my niece Sadie.

I love me some PLAID. But only ONE design? Really, folks? I know checks are-as I've said-- passé. But still...show a little friggen' EFFORT, wouldja? These are noteworthy because plaid is innately awesome-- prevented from being a real contender on account of there being just 1 design. Now, if I was able to personalize and order in my clan tartan then this would shoot up to the top 3 of the contender list.
I think Laura had these checks at one time...and not all that long ago either. She has different ones now (I know this since she just gave me a check on Saturday) They really go thru a lotta checks those guys. Those 20th century checks I just polished off?? I've had those since the dawn of time or thereabouts. No kidding. 2 boxes last me FOREVAH.

"Founding Fathers" checks...also a front runner in my mind. Seriously, I love these. I feel like you may be scoffing because there was a deal of scoffing amongst my coworkers. Heather got my email and she said "Oooh you found some good ones.." then there was a pause and she goes "wait--what the hell are these OLD GUY CHECKS??" Lisa recognized the theme, but she said "Ugh. Yuck on the Founding Fathers checks."
But Robin was with me in appreciating these checks. Well, peer support or no, I think they're just terrif...

"Emerald Isle" checks from Identity Checks. I also scoped out some scenic England checks they offered and some "Bonnie Scotland".. but I thought they got their best shots of Ireland. I would love to visit (or retire to??) any of those countries so I feel more entitled to using these checks (than the Vegas ones). Although my concern is that gazing regularly at these lovely vistas would make me all wistful and --ultimately-- discontent.

Well, more discontent than I already am, I mean....


I was grousing aloud to the office-- you get what, 4 books per box o' checks (I don't quite recall. As I've said it's been ages since I've had to order checks) I wish one of these check companies would allow you to mix styles within a box. WHY on earth isn't this offered ?? Robin's answer to that question (WHY?) is probably the truth. She figures there's just not much demand for such thing ...because few people AGONIZE over check selection like I do...