Today I was working in the supply room unpacking boxes of envelopes and I farted. Not terribly loud. Medium loud. The unfortunate part of this scenario is that I wasn't in there alone. Larry was in there too, but he was at his desk, across the room, with a couple of metal shelving units between us, and he was listening (I hope, very intently) to Howie Carr on the radio. Also it was odorless. And, in case it was heard over the blatherings of Howie, I was careful to suppress any audible reaction (though I felt myself blush instantly) and did a brilliant job of following it up with a lot of box unpacking noises so that one might think it was an odd audio byproduct of that task...the pooting of box lids or something. (Yeah, I dunno. It was a REFLEX...not very well thought out)
Well, whether it was noticed or not, he didn't say anything and I shook off my embarrassment pretty swiftly.
In other trivial, lowbrow news, my father had to replace his toilet seat. For some unfathomable reason, he did not trudge down to Walmart like 90% of the populace would. No, he got online (part of it, I think, is he's just inordinately pleased with himself for mastering online shopping) and tracked down what I presume is the finest toilet seat known to mankind. Or I hope it is anyways...he paid $46. for it. Am I missing something? Is that the going rate for toilet seats nowadays?? I'm thinking it's a smidge pricey.
The first thing he said to me when I got here tonight was "Didja check out the bathroom??" All eager-like he was. I suppose, if I'd shilled out $46....well, if I wasn't enthused, I would make myself be... I told him for that price it should wipe your ass for you.
(I know, I know...I'm so crude. I promise my next post will be 100 x more refined)
1 comment:
My toilet seat was $50 but it has hydrolics in it so it never slams.
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