So I’ve told you that I’m designated office delivery wench, yes? Well, I am. Today I had to drive out to Lyme (and these far-away errands always pop up at the times when I'm at about a 1/2 tank of gas and trying to stretch out $25 until my next payday) to bring catheters to our nurse Shari who was having trouble with an insertion.
Yeeeeah….so it was NOT the simple delivery& hand-off& departure I was expecting. I wound up on flashlight detail. All those years of illuminating my Dad’s auto repairs came in handy. Actually I was hoping I’d start having auto repair flashbacks and start hallucinating carburetors & oil filters (which would have distracted me from the fact that I was looking at some lady’s urethra)
At one point, I’m holding the flashlight and Shari sez “ Do you want to be my assistant?” (without any further elaboration) And I’m trying to maintain my poker face (all the while, I’m trying to decide which sort of poker face would be most reassuring to the poor patient. I think a blank stare would be unnerving but a too smiley smile could be waaay worse…I tried to achieve a happy medium) and wanted to respond “I am NOT QUALIFIED to do *anything* beyond flashlight duty!!” but I thought a whole sentence might come out panicky sounding, so I said “Hmm?” Come to find out, she just wanted me to open a cath package because her hands were all be-gloved & lubey…so nothing too exceedingly clinical for me. But I was a bit petrified for a moment there.
I have long suspected that I don’t have what it takes to be a nurse….I am SO sure of it now!!
1 comment:
OMG...I thought you were going to say you ran out of gas or something. I think I would have rather had that be the outcome. I would have been all blushing and nervous if I had to hold the flashlight. Whew...
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